Lewis Family Update 8-20-10

Lewis Family Update 8-20-10

Hello Everyone,

It's been over two months since my last letter and as usual much has changed and much has stayed the same. Emily and Jeannie have both started back to school. Emily starts 8th grade and Jeannie 5th. They are both doing great as usual but not without first week jitters and the familiar thoughts of where did my summer vacation go? They both continue to amaze me with their resilience and attitude after what they have been through and are going through. Cindy did an amazing job getting them ready for the future and instilling in them the ability to survive and cope.

Our summer was full of much traveling. This was more for me than for the girls but I tried to make sure they had fun along the way. Now that I look back on this summer I have to admit that it was me trying to run away from the elephant standing right in front of me. I was and still do a lot of what I do to avoid being at home or facing my fears and my insecurities after losing Cindy. I have pretty much accepted this fact and try not to beat myself up about these insecurities but they still linger and haunt me. They might always sadden me but this also reminds me of the precious love and bond Cindy and I had. While it is obvious I would not have chosen for Cindy to have left this world, I would have chosen over and over again to have spent my life with her how ever long that might have been. Our outcome could never change the blessing I received from Cindy or the hope I have with my girls.

I made it through another milestone on July 18th as it would have been our 18th wedding anniversary. I tried to stay busy with the girls and honestly tried to not associate the day with the anniversary to much. It seemed to help? As always afterward I felt guilty not knowing if I had done the right thing. Was I trying to forget too soon or at the minimum not give it the attention it deserved? I think everyone has to work through change in their own way and I did the best I knew to do at this point. One of the things I keep clinging to is that I was able to say everything I wanted to say to Cindy before she left. What a blessing it was now that I look back. I also think about the fact that even if I hadn't known she would be dying I still was fortunate to have been able to tell her and show her my love in the past on so many occasions. Yes, I had the chance but she knew no matter what came our way. Another blessing that most of us don't think about but we can be confident in.

So what is happening in the Lewis family right now? Back several months ago while we were on one of our worldwide trips the girls and I happened upon a chain of of bookstores in south Georgia named Gottwals Books. They had three stores within a 30 miles radius of where we were staying and we decided to go to all three stores before heading home. I was very impressed by the stores and the whole concept. These were not your usual hole in the wall used book stores. They were clean, bright, organized and seemed to be well managed. At our third and last stop we met this young, fresh out of college looking man who was the co-owner of all three stores. I picked his brain a little and we went on our way. For the next two months the visit to his stores ate at me to the point that I called him up and started asking many more questions. Now eight months later I am only about two months from opening my own book store here in Mt Juliet. WOW!! How things change and how God has truly guided and lead me to my next opportunity. I still have much work to do with this new venture but I'm very excited about the future and my future with my daughters and the city of Mt Juliet. I personally see this as a way for me to get closer to people and share my story with them in a laid back way. Our plan is to promote cancer research, primarily ovarian cancer, and give 5% of all sales to the Minnie Pearl Foundation here in Nashville. The name will be "Cindy Lou's Books" and we hope to carry on the memory of Cindy and promote her love of reading and her love of helping others. I ask you pray for our success and not just in book sales but in reaching others through relationships and sharing information. As you can imagine my girls are very excited and I am very humbled that God has lead me to this point. I pray daily for wisdom as we move forward with this new road in our lives.

I wanted to share the names of people that mean so much to my life as they struggle right now. Ron Milam who is a long time church friend. Ron has a brain tumor that has come back after many years. He and his wife Pam are special people to me and I pray that his next surgery gives the results that they are all looking for right now. I have mentioned in past letters Hester Brown who lives in Texas. Hester is also fighting ovarian cancer and is going through chemo treatments. Hester is my second mom and I continue to pray for God to step in and cure her of this cancer. The father of my friend Jonathan Hortan is fighting throat cancer. I also want to remember Cindy's great Aunt Mae Bell who just had heart surgery and is recovering. Please remember them all as they fight the good fight for their health.

I also want to mention the great things that have been happening. My brother Mike who has been out of work for several months just started a great job down in Texas. My brother-in-law Jason who is working again after many months out of work. It's not a perfect job but I am proud that he is willing to work until a better job comes along. Elizabeth the wife of my nephew Scott is in school working on her teaching degree. My sister LeAnne who has went back to school to recently to further her education and have a better future. All good things come from God and to God be the glory!

I say this over and over but I thank each of you for letting me share my life. You are all my outlet for venting and for sharing the great things God has done and is continuing to do in my life. I pray your eyes are always open so that you too can see God's blessing in your life.

In Christ
Mark